How Mediating Saved My Soul While Campaigning for Public Office
In 2024, I ran for the Board of Directors for Marin Water, the public agency that provides local water service to more than 191,000 people in central and southern Marin County, as well as manages Marin’s watershed, water, and facilities under its purview. I thought running for office would be my chance “to make a difference,” especially because wildfire prevention and water reliability are two of the top things that Marin Water focuses on, and I feel passionately about both those issues. And after a long campaign and a close vote, I’m proud to announce that I was elected to office.
As a mediator, I have learned to listen actively, empathize with diverse perspectives, and negotiate solutions, finding consensus where previously none existed. I hoped that these qualities would make me an attractive candidate for public office and build trust and credibility with voters.
I just didn’t expect to use my mediation skills while campaigning.
Without those skills I might have dropped out of the race – something I am glad I did not do because I’m immensely enjoying my new position. As I’d hoped I would, I feel that I am putting my time and energy towards a local, unique, and vital service opportunity. I am also able to represent constituents in their diverse views about the most important environmental issues Marin faces.
However, during campaigning, I encountered countless unexpected obstacles. For example, I naively believed that Marin was a liberal bastion wherein our residents recognized that sexism, racism, ableism, etc. was real, and an important thing to validate. Yet, I found time and time again that if I even mentioned the importance of having a woman on the currently all-male board as being important, that was all people heard. Once or twice someone parroted the comment back to me as inappropriate, even though in that same sentence, I mentioned five other things that made me a great candidate. There was also no recognition of how many other qualifications I had for the job: for example, that I have worked as a legislative aide for one of the most pro-environment Congressmen that ever has graced Capitol Hill (and who sponsored bills on safe drinking water), that I have a first-class education, have been a successful businesswoman, and clearly know how to get things done. In addition, there was zero recognition that women have a different experience and therefore unique and different things to bring to a role where only men currently govern. This was particularly ironic given that I reviewed countless studies conducted all over the world by reputable agencies like the World Health Organization that found women bear the brunt of water scarcity and have very different feelings about water and the environment than men do.
I also was a bit flabbergasted that I was asked by several key individuals if I was sure that I had the time it would take to do the job. My most prominent opponent was also an attorney and had two toddlers while I have two teenagers, and not once was he asked this same question. Needless to say, I found this question infantilizing. Clearly, I believed I had the time or I would not be running for public office. When men declare they are running for office, people do not ask them if they are sure they have time. Why? Perhaps there is not the same assumption that home life will take a lot of their time since many have wives that ostensibly do most of that work (ironically, I am the primary bread-earner and have a rock star husband who does a disproportionate share of domestic work. I guess that possibility did not even occur to people). Or it may simply be that men are treated like fully-grown human beings whose decisions on how to spend their time are theirs alone to make. It’s no wonder that women are so underrepresented in politics.
Likewise, I was naïve about the range of opinions that I would find on the issue of water supply and reliability, and the corresponding certainty each person had that their narrative was the correct one. All my years of mediation training and many, many hours spent on silent meditation retreats (where you gain insight about the nature of mind) have taught me that there is nothing more important than having the humility to question one’s own narrative or “story,” and to not believe everything we think. Yet many people hold strong opinions on the one true water source we should be cultivating to augment Marin’s water supply. It seemed like for the first time, I was seeing how many people had never looked directly at their own minds and the assumptions they make as they go through the world. Most folks simply did not have a lot of curiosity about the other possibilities, nor did they even seemed interested in listening to facts that contradicted their view. As someone who enjoys challenging my own assumptions as often as possible, this stumped me.
Thank goodness, though, this is where my mediation training came in. Although at times I felt angry, confused, alienated, or disillusioned, I questioned my own narrative about the assumptions I made, and tried to stay focused on the issues. I tried to hold two divergent viewpoints at the same time, just as I do when resolving a lawsuit. I tried not to “other” the people whose views I found hard to understand, as I figured that would be in the camp of the kind of extremists that currently run our country - a point-of-view that I think serves no one. So, I considered that I was being asked about having time for the job because I ran a law firm and my opponent did not. I considered that advocates were saving their most passionate viewpoints on water for conversations with a potential elected official to be sure that I really heard them. They did not want me to play devil’s advocate in that moment — they needed to know only that they had been heard. I certainly understood how important it is simply to feel someone is carefully listening to what you are saying. Overall, I found that implementing mediation strategies helped me navigate campaign challenges by fostering dialogue, understanding differing perspectives, and finding common ground. There was so much of campaigning that I did enjoy when I looked at it from this perspective. I met wonderful people, and for all the petty comments I heard, there were far more people who told me what an incredible addition I would make to the Board, and how much they appreciated that I would try and do such important service.
In sum, I am hopeful that my mediation skills will play an important role in my public service work. Effective mediation strategies are essential for resolving disputes over policy positions and resource allocation among the board and with the public. Mediation can be used as a process to navigate complex policy issues through consensus-building. In the same vein, I am hopeful that the influence of public service will make me a better mediator by honing my resolution skills and my ability to remain equanimous in hard situations – something that I was forced to learn while campaigning. Even if not, however, the lessons I learned while campaigning make me forever grateful that I am a mediator.
Author: Diana Maier, Partner. Diana is a Spanish-speaking mediator and workplace investigator, as well as a seasoned employment lawyer. Diana’s specialty is resolving employment and business dispute litigation, as well as interpersonal conflict in the workplace.